-a damaging immune response by the body to a substance, to which it has become hypersensitive.
I feel as though sometimes, I’m trying to ignore the fact that I am hypersensitive to the feeling of not being enough. Whether that be in my relationship with myself, my relationship with friends, my relationship with family, or my relationship with my significant other. There seems to be an endless stream of self doubt that constantly reminds me, “you aren’t good enough.” Thinking rationally, I know this isn’t true, but I do know there is so much work I can put in towards growth in these areas. There is no simple solution. It can’t be subdued with an antihistamine or a home remedy.
A lot of the time, I have these allergic reactions to self confidence and positive feelings of self worth when I feel like I am not contributing to the conversation. If I am not able to provide what I’ve grown up to think is enough in terms of mental, physical, spiritual, and financial support to those close to me, and to myself. I want to be able to give my all to everyone around me, but always end up feeling as though I have come up short and have nothing left to give to myself.
This year, I’ve decided that it’s time to stop feeling as though I am constantly running on empty in terms of self worth and value to those around me. I am allowed to see myself as beautiful, strong, independent, stable, funny, charming, and most of all worthy. I am worthy of the love I am constantly surrounded by. I no longer need to hide away my feelings of self doubt and my discomfort with positive self worth. I know nothing can be achieved without dispelling negativity, so I plan to cleanse my mind and soul of these “allergies” with the support of those around me.
The need to seek validation through an exhaustive process of self doubt and no sense of self worth is no longer the path I choose to take. I only see a future that aims towards seeking cure to an allergic reaction of my own making in an effective, self aware, positive, light.
Indecisively, Izzie 